Day 56 - 我以为你从没离开过，原来你从就不存在

下一段会更好，吗?
我很累很累很累很累

第一段，我给了全部，我也强势了很多，限制对方也很多，结果失败了
第二段，我给了全部，我让她做全部她都喜欢的，结果我什么都没有，我什么都不是，什么地位都没有，两百块的耳机我到现在都没有开过，她不知道我在之前已经买了，她不知道我的事，她什么都不知道

我的脸书没有她，她的脸书没有我，只有一堆我不认识的男人
因为我抽烟，她就说不要跟我讲话了；
她去别的男人家睡, 所谓的bro, 我不能有意见。
难道我出轨了吗？....

可以的话，我可以不要结婚吗? 妈。

谁来打救我?...

Day 3 - Raining raining raining raining rain...

Do you know?

I'll always love you - a song dedicated for someone who lost the one who loved so much, but in the end not together

I'll never love again - a song that talking about forever and eternal love

Don't wanna feel another touch
Don't wanna start another fire
Don't wanna know another kiss
No other name falling off my lips
Don't wanna give my heart away
To another stranger
Or let another day begin
Won't even let the sunlight in
No, I'll never love again
I'll never love again, oh, oh, oh, oh

Do you know I'm here?
You don't, unless you're here.

Day 2 - Raining is my mood.

God always know my mood.
She give me rain this morning, heavily, very heavily.

I know I wanna act hero.
I know I'm not really that stress.
I know I'm sad.

But...
I don't know if I will look back this blog.
I don't know if what I said is good for everyone.
I don't know if I will be happier after this.

However,
I just wish you do anything you feel right and that can make you happy.
And I hope loving me is the best thing you will feel happy.

If that even possible.

Day 2

"为你弹奏萧邦的乐曲 纪念我逝去的爱情"

                                                     - 夜曲 by 周杰伦

Day 1 - tellmewattodo

tellmewattodo - something I struggling since the time I start to think.

Is love logical?
Can I solve it in logical way?
No. I don't think so.

Is love two way?
No. I still don't think so.

Love is always one way.
The time you love the other. The other not really love you.
And the time the other love you, but you don't love the other.

It always works this way.
No exception.
There is no love-love connection.

Whenever I try to love, I giving all I can.
All I get is hurt, sad, scolding, saying I didn't give enough.

I voice my feeling - I being blamed for giving stress.
I don't voice my feeling - I being blamed for not telling truth.

I don't tell you my feeling - you feel cheated.
I tell you my feeling - you feel blamed.

I don't know what to do.
Can I have my feeling?
Can I request some dignity?
Can I at least be your friend than your dog? ( I think dog is even better than me)

So.
Tell me wat to do?

I really should've give up on "love".
I'm always loser.
Always.
Since 2010.